We hereby command you to fill out the Happiness Survey, please
The regular season is waning, and I have zero data about your emotional state vis a vis the Washington Capitals. This is…
They should be the Utah Dragons
The Utah Hockey Team will not be called the Utah Yeti. The stated reason for abandoning that option is trademark difficulties, but…
Your preseason predictions were very bad (and that’s very good)
In October, you very kindly gave your predictions for the 2024-25 season. You were probably very wrong, I'm sorry to say. The…
Halfway into the season, you must now complete the Happiness Survey
Fifty percent done, and it went so fast. Wednesday's overtime win over Vancouver was Washington's 41st game of the season, and that…
Make your predictions for the 2024-25 season
It is upon us. The 2024-25 season has already begun for most of the NHL. The only things left are for the…
The Washington Capitals’ final Opening Night roster spot is down to Jakub Vrana, Ivan Miroshnichenko, and Andrew Cristall
The Washington Capitals gave major insight into what their Opening Night roster will look like after putting goaltender Hunter Shepard on NHL…
Seeing Joe Snively in Red Wings gear reminds us of his incredible journey from Capitals fan to player
Joe Snively grew up in Herndon, Virginia, and was a childhood fan of the Washington Capitals. Back in 2018, before he was…
So ends the peak Nick era of the Washington Capitals
In 1928, Manitoba's own Nikolas "Nick" Wasnie began his NHL career. He would go on to play for five teams in seven…
NHL reds, ranked
In any given NHL game, there is a greater than 1-in-3 chance that one of the teams is wearing a red jersey.…
Paul Maurice’s sarcastic response to Jacob Trouba’s ‘maximum’ fine for elbowing: ‘He won’t be able to eat’
Paul Maurice, the Florida Panthers' successful and sassy head coach, was not impressed by the NHL's fine of New York Rangers' defenseman…
Playoff predictions, third round: Peter vs Ian vs Keith, a coin
Let's go! I think we've got two really exciting series for these conference finals. In the east, two teams that should have…
Playoff predictions, second round: Peter vs Ian vs Keith, a coin
Hoo boy, that was a fun quarterfinal round. There was a sweep and a game seven and everything in between. But no…
Happiness Survey, end of 2024: Executive Summary (do not distribute)
Your participation in the Happiness Survey was appreciated by everyone here in the Customer Success Department of RMNB. Our team completed rigorous…
Caps fans are boarding the Carolina Hurricanes bandwagon
As you may have heard, the Washington Capitals were eliminated from the Stanley Cup Playoffs by the New York Rangers. It took…
Playoff predictions, first round: Peter vs Ian vs Keith, a coin
I know I say this every year, but here come the best couple weeks in hockey. Manufacture whatever excuses you can to…
You will now complete the Caps Happiness Survey
The regular season is over and the Washington Capitals now prepare for the Stanley Cup Playoffs. In this moment, we demand to…
Better know a Hurricane: Evgeny “Kuzy” Kuznetsov
On Friday night, the Washington Capitals will play host the Carolina Hurricanes for an important game. Suiting up for the visiting team…
To me, Chris Simon was hockey
Apologies for beginning with inside information, but I've been planning a series for the summer where we'd remember and revisit some Caps…
The Washington Capitals should trade one of their goalies at the NHL trade deadline
The NHL is weeks away from its March 8 trade deadline. Despite stronger, more consistent play recently, the Washington Capitals should be…
Happiness Survey, February 2024: Executive Summary (confidential)
Thank you for completing the Happiness Survey, a silly and mandatory check-in about your feelings. This is the second survey of the…
