Uncle Barry brought his new family to town on Saturday for the last game of the regular season, where the Capitals lost to the Islanders 3-0. This was inconsequential for the Caps’ playoff position, since they already clinched the Metro title, but devastating in terms of Caps hugs held.
On a night when various results around the league finally brought the Rubix cube of 2018-19 playoff matchups into alignment, watching other games’ scores update was more exciting than watching this game. But for a recap of what did happen, here’s Mr. Cerullo’s summary.
Before the “game”
Nicklas Backstrom, TJ Oshie, and John Carlson sat out the game to rest up for playoffs.
They did all attend the morning practice, where Nicklas Backstrom’s hair looked like this.
For your consideration: one gently tucked curl pic.twitter.com/qNOaKN3h3y
— elizabeth (@of_elk) April 6, 2019
Michal Kempny was also out because he tore a hamstring and will be out 4-6 months after surgery. This fan offered up their own hamstring during warm-ups.
Do it for Kempny 🙏 pic.twitter.com/4bFznyit4G
— elizabeth (@of_elk) April 6, 2019
Nathan Walker also sat this game out, but he did take pregame warmups after being called up from the Hershey Bears. He and Holtby had a little chat by the bench.
cute. #allcaps pic.twitter.com/VRj3EuwZeM
— x. (@youripides) April 6, 2019
At morning skate, Tom Wilson used Nathan Walker as an armrest. They do this a lot.
tom really likes using nathan as an armrest pic.twitter.com/Ek4tzyvj6C
— x. (@youripides) April 6, 2019
Kuznetsov didn’t get the puck in the net, but he did almost get it through the photographer’s hole in the plexiglass during warm-ups.
During the “game”
This game was Xanax on ice.
Here’s Brooks Orpik after Tom Kuhnackl went dangerously low when Orpik tried to hit him.
Y’know when your dog has an accident on the carpet and you push their face in it to punish them? That’s what Orpik did to Kuhnackel.
…don’t do that to dogs though, they don’t understand it and it’s just mean. The jury’s out on what effect it has on hockey players.
Carl Hagelin went to the box for a while.
His hair has more highlights than this game.
In a collection of nice quotes about Tom Wilson’s play since he returned from his suspension and started lighting up the scoreboard, this one from Barry Trotz might very well be the nicest.
A quote from last fall: “Barry Trotz could not say enough good things about Tom Wilson…on and off the ice. Said he’s one of his favorite guys. He said ‘I don’t care what you say to me, I will never, ever go against Tom Wilson. No matter what he does, I will always defend him.’”
— x. (@youripides) April 6, 2019
HUGS!
The Islanders hugged. They’re bad at it. Boo.
Trotz taught the Isles a lot of things that helped the Capitals to success, but not how to hug. Weird. 🤨 pic.twitter.com/YQl7ne4jv4
— x. (@youripides) April 7, 2019
Their second hug was somehow worse than the first.
This hug somehow creates more distance than chemistry. Fascinating. 🧐 pic.twitter.com/oWbG150jiJ
— x. (@youripides) April 7, 2019
Their third hug goal hug was even worse than the first two combined. Then: Because they won the game. They hugged their goalie. Except. Some of them. Shook. Their goalie’s. Hand.
they’re supposed to be goalie HUGS not goalie HANDSHAKES pic.twitter.com/BGe4BhNhci
— x. (@youripides) April 7, 2019
I am so disgusted I can’t even process what the implications of this could be for the Stanley Cup playoffs.
After the “game”
The Capitals’ last home game meant it was Fan Appreciation Night! The players took a short break, then came back out to the ice and each gave a game-worn, autographed jersey to some lucky fans.
This hug was better than all the Islanders’ hugs put together.
The Capitals’ next game will be against the Carolina Hurricanes. With any luck they’ll be better at hugging and worse at hockey.
In conclusion,
he really out here just casually looking like this pic.twitter.com/SHiREgD9IJ
— x. (@youripides) April 7, 2019
