Twenty sixteen was a mess. It was swirling chaos in which the things we depend on vanished and in their place came a grim mockery of fairness and equanimity. Appropriate then that the final Caps game of 2016 was refereed by Marc Joannette. The zebraman of the apocalypse tooted his evil whistle early and often, intending to make this the game of his will. The Capitals did not comply.
Andre Burakovsky sent a perfect pass to Brett Connolly to open up scoring, but scoring paused there once John Moore was injured by Tom Wilson. Later, Jay Beagle tapped in a point shot by Brooks Orpik to set a tone of eschatological ruin.
The second period was lousy with penalties. A three-on-three and an errant pass from Kyznetsov gave Kyle Palmieri a chance to score that he did not miss. But then the Caps erupted with three goals in six minutes: Oshie, Ovechkin, and Williams all struck before the second intermission.
Beau Bennett scored for the Devils in the third, but Marcus Johansson responded immediately.
Caps beats Devils 6-2!
Six goals! Let’s finish this year off with some Enrique!
- Everyone is with us in hoping John Moore makes a speedy recovery. Not everything agrees about Tom Wilson‘s hit. My take: that hit happens in every game but rarely that hard. Wilson plainly hit Moore’s numbers, but he hadn’t finished the hit and hadn’t done it with such momentum, it would have been an unspectacular hit. I could understand chalking the injury up to terrible luck, but it seems like terrible luck is a bit more common when Wilson’s involved. That’s because he’s a massive fella who rarely pulls up or rides someone into the walls. If you think that’s a mark on the player, fine, but the whole league and all of hockey culture are on the hook for sanctioning that kind of play.
- Before we descend into penalty hell, how about a round of applause for Brett Connolly and Andre Burakovsky? They’ve been playing solid hockey all season, but they’ve rarely been rewarded with goals. When you make a pass as nice as the one Burra sent Connolly, a goal is basically guaranteed.
- Brooks Orpik got an assist on a Jay Beagle goal, which some biblical scholars consider equivalent to a plague of locusts. Remember when we heard that Beagle’s new deal came with the expectation of offense? Well, he’s delivering so far.
- Okay, so the penalties.
| Period | Time | Player | Penalty |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 5:13 | CONNOLLY | Roughing |
| 1 | 5:13 | CONNOLLY | Slashing |
| 1 | 8:34 | OVECHKIN | Illegal check to head |
| 1 | 11:06 | ORLOV | Interference |
| 1 | 19:47 | ELLER | Interference on goalkeeper |
| 2 | 5:01 | WILLIAMS | Tripping |
| 2 | 5:54 | ORLOV | Interference |
| 2 | 8:21 | TEAM | Too many men/ice – bench |
| 2 | 12:15 | WILLIAMS | Holding the stick |
| 2 | 19:23 | WILSON | Fighting (maj) |
| 3 | 0:13 | OSHIE | Too much hair |
| 3 | 0:14 | BURAKOVSKY | Too cute – cannot even |
| 3 | 1:11 | ORPIK | Excessive clip art in powerpoint |
| 3 | 1:15 | ELLER | Double dipping the chip |
| 3 | 2:13 | WINNIK | Belt doesn’t match shoes |
| 3 | 5:15 | BEAGLE | Does not text back promptly |
| 3 | 6:42 | SCHMIDT | Stop smiling so much |
| 3 | 7:17 | ALZNER | Dabbing |
| 3 | 8:08 | OVECHKIN | Putin |
| 3 | 9:56 | CARLSON | New Jerseying |
| 3 | 11:12 | CONNOLLY | Keeps putting Tame Impala on party mixes |
| 3 | 14:16 | KUZNETSOV | Failed to Venmo me back for Qdoba last week |
| 3 | 17:45 | GRUBAUER | Still does manual retweets |
- We’re told that officials try not to influence the game, just enforce the rulebook. That was not the case on Saturday, which was a mess. I suppose the officials regretted not whistling Wilson for his hit on Moore and therefore unleashed make-up calls. That’s a shame, as it makes the officials as present on the scoresheet as the players. I can’t even recall the last time I saw 3-on-3 hockey during regulation.
So far this is worst officiated game I've seen #Capitals involved in this season.
— Alan May (@AlanMay_16) December 31, 2016
— Elyse (@ElyseBee) December 31, 2016
- Goalsplosion! Alex Ovechkin had that lucky bounce one-timer to get his 17th, T.J Oshie roofed it, and I can’t even remember Justin Williams‘ first goal. The net effect is that the officials abandoned their coup and we got a bailamos.
- Keith Kincaid, lol.
- As things reacher their chippy peak in the second, Philipp Grubauer had enough. He flipped out on Miles Wood. From the bench, Braden Holtby clearly loved it.
Joe B suit of the early afternoon here at the end of all things
I’m torn on this one. This was an ugly game with a horrifying injury about which honest people will disagree. But it was also an unpredictable, high-scoring matchup where the better team won.
Friends, have a safe and happy new years eve, and let’s do this again tomorrow.
