Recently during an intermission, the Detroit Red Wings debuted a new sport: Bubble Hockey.
It sounds and looks the way you’d imagine. A person wearing a plastic bubble tries to knock a mondo puck into the opposing team’s net.
But it’s so much more than that.
This is such glorious, glorious chaos.
Because the players are in bubbles, they don’t have a a great idea of where their bubble-bodies begin and end. On top of that, they’re running on ice in shoes. If the contestants aren’t falling because of how slippery it is, I can promise you someone’s about to knock they’re bubble block off either due to the malice in their heart or their lack of coordination.
Because of this, Bubble Hockey produces more highlight-reel hits than its derivative sport without those pesky things called “injuries.” Though if you don’t tie your shoes tight, I could easily see how someone could shatter an ankle.
Last Friday, the Wisconsin Badgers also had their fans play a bubble game during intermission. The only difference was that they played with a tinier puck. It’s still just as great.
I’m not sure who exactly invented this sport, but I’m going to go ahead and credit Jake Gyllenhaal.
Russian Machine Never Breaks is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.
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