Mike Green’s Terrible, Horrible No Good, Very Bad Night: Four Minor Penalties, 18 PIMs in First Period

December 10, 2013 9:44 pm

No matter how bad your day has been, Mike Green‘s was worse. The two-time Norris nominee was whistled for three infractions in the first period, leading to two Tampa Bay Lightning goals. In total, Green racked up 18 penalty minutes in just 9:18 of ice time. Comcast SportsNet commentator Alan May diagnosed the penalties during the first intermission, calling them “textbook” and the result of “laziness.”

Let’s review.

4-Minute Double Minor For High Sticking

It started just two minutes into the game. As Lightning forward Valtteri Filppula went hard to the net, Green clipped him in the face with his stick blade. Martin St. Louis would score 12 seconds later.

2-Minutes for Tripping

6:57 later, Green didn’t skate particularly hard in the neutral zone and got lazy with his stick. The result: a two-minute minor for a corkscrew trip on Ondrej Palat. 1:42 later, Nikita Kucherov scores on the power play.

2-Minutes for High-Sticking

As soon as Green got out of the box, he got the infraction hat trick, high-sticking Tyler Johnson.

10-Minute Misconduct

GIFs by welshhockeyfan

After the whistle, Green yelled out loud, “Fuck me. What the fuck!” (Kids: don’t use swear words.) That’s your ten-minute misconduct right there.

Green has earned the most single-game PIMS by a Caps defender since Bryan Muir got 19 in three periods against the Penguins in December 2006. For the record, Brendan Witt got 31 against Buffalo back in 2005, and John Erskine had 29 against Atlanta in 2006.

Despite his troubles, Washington Capitals assistant coach Calle Johansson showed confidence in Green while talking to Al Koken during a break in play during the first period. “He’s been around long enough,” Johansson said. “He just needs to settle down, start skating, and focus a little bit. That’s what we all have to do. It’s not just him.”

Regardless, what a joke of a period.

My "single season" #Caps penalty minute record is in serious jeopardy of being passed in just a "single period"

— Alan May (@MayHockeyNBCS) December 11, 2013