We are not in the Stanley Cup Playoffs, but when I say we I do not mean the Washington Capitals, although they are not in the playoffs either.
For some professionals, the distinction between we and the team is a matter of journalistic integrity. Not for me. For me, it’s just confusing. Does we refer to about RMNB or one of the teams we cover? In this case it’s both. Because RMNB is also not competing for the Stanley Cup. We are not a sports team. We are an international, independent, credentialed hockey and meteoritics-focused media conglomerate with a 17-year history – nearly ten of which has included asking a quarter who will in in the playoffs, which brings me at long last to the point.
The quarterfinal round is the best couple weeks of hockey all year. Get ready for multiple games of intensity every night. And to set the stage, it’s time to make predictions, featuring Keith, a Coin.
Meet Keith, a Coin
Keith, a Coin, is both a quarter and in the top-10 among longest running bits on RMNB. He’s from Pennsylvania, but he’s famously impartial. Last year he went 2-for-8 in the first round.
The results so far
Using the universally understood 🚽/🌮 score-keeping system.
| First Round | Peter | Ian | Keith |
|---|---|---|---|
| COL vs LAK | |||
| DAL vs MIN | |||
| VGK vs UTA | |||
| EDM vs ANA | |||
| BUF vs BOS | |||
| TBL vs MTL | |||
| CAR vs OTT | |||
| PIT vs PHI | |||
| Second Round | Peter | Ian | Keith |
| TBD | |||
| TBD | |||
| TBD | |||
| TBD | |||
| Third Round | Peter | Ian | Keith |
| TBD | |||
| TBD | |||
| Finals | Peter | Ian | Keith |
| TBD |
Head’s up: We also have a Bracket League for our Patreon subscribers. Get on there if you haven’t already. You also get some cool exclusive features on the website, including some easter eggs no one has found yet.
Avalanche ❄️ vs Kings 👑
Peter: Colorado is the best all-around team in the league. Their power play sucks, but if there’s one thing you can’t depend on in the postseason it’s that, so no big loss. The Kings have atrocious special teams (both of them), and their top scorer, Adrian Kempe, is relying on career-high shooting to hit 36 goals. Colorado in 5.
Ian: The Avalanche vs the ‘Win It For Anze’ Kings. The obvious pick here is Nathan MacKinnon, but like Danhausen doing his worst to Kit Wilson, (It’s Wrestlemania Saturday, folks), I think he. is. cursed! Give me Los Angeles in 6. (I’m going to regret this, I know it.)
Keith: Los Angeles in 7. (Editor’s note: Keith is predicting a reverse sweep here.)
Stars ⭐ vs Wild 🐅
Peter: The Wild went 11-9-2 since March 1, but I don’t think that’s indicative of their underlying play. I’ve been sick all week but through the haze I heard Quinn Hughes is questionable for game 1. For that reason, I’ll extend this series a bit. Minnesota in 6.
Ian: I’ve got three words for you: Quintin Jerome Hughes. Minnesota in 5.
Keith: Minnesota in 5.
Vegas ♞ vs Utah 🦣
Peter: I get being skeptical about the Mammoth, but they looked pretty good down the stretch. Their 7-4 loss to the Caps was an aberration. They’re outmatched by Vegas in most stats, except goaltending – where the Golden Knights were so bad (Adin Hill saved 14 goals below expected) that they got Bruce Cassidy fired. I can’t trust that. Utah in 6.
Ian: The Mammoth are built to be a good in the playoffs, and I think this is a terrible matchup for the Golden Knights, who are led by one of the most unhinged coaches in NHL history. How Torts keeps getting jobs is beyond me, but I think the Mammoth will put them out of their misery quickly. Utah in 4.
Keith: Utah in 6.
Oilers 🛢️ vs Ducks 🦆
Peter: One of these teams has the worst five-on-give goaltending in the league, and the other one is three spots better. In a lot of ways they’re evenly matched with the exception of the best player in the world and league’s best power play. But like I said – I don’t trust the PP in the loffs. Edmonton in 7.
Ian: Ah, a battle between two of the best defensemen in the NHL: Evan Bouchard and John Carlson. I think the Ducks are surprisingly solid up and down the lineup, but their atrocious goaltending is ultimately going to do them in against Connor McDavid and Leon Draisaitl. Edmonton in 6.
Keith: Edmonton in 5.
Sabres ⚔️ vs Bruins 🐻
Peter: One of these teams is going to make the second round, but neither probably deserves it. I’m happy for Buffalo. Tage is great, and I love how Jason Zucker has remained a positive-impact player into his mid-30s. But they’re a shooting-percentage-driven team (ranked 5th), and that’s a glass cannon situation. Boston is the opposite – goalie-driven while stars like Pastrnak at in career downswings. It’s not who wins this series but rather who doesn’t lose it. Boston in 6.
Ian: There’s something about the Sabres that make me think this could be a magical year. Sometimes, playoff series can teach teams how to go to evolve, how to go to those dirty areas and score without relying on skill, and I think they’re built to go deep. If they can figure out Boston’s goaltender, whoever is waiting in Round 2, watch out. Buffalo in 6.
Keith: Buffalo in 4.
Lightning ⚡vs Canadiens 🥐
Peter: The Bolts are going to systematically dismantle the Habs. Neither team is particularly fast, but the Bolts are deeper, tougher, and better coached. Kucherov is nutso right now. Tampa in 4.
Ian: The Canadiens are a good team — we saw the beginnings of it in the playoffs last year — and I think they are going to wallop Tampa, who’s on the downswing. Montreal in 6.
Keith: Montreal in 7. (Editor’s note: Truly, a cursed prediction.)
Hurricanes 🌀 vs Senators 👴
Peter: What a weird postseason. We’re letting the Senators in? They’ll let anyone in! But Carolina is, as usual, a tough team to nail down. They drive play better than anyone in the league, but they have poor finishing and worse goaltending. It doesn’t make sense, but I bet they’ll have enough to win at least one series. Carolina in 6.
Ian: I think Carolina is going to get randomly humbled here. The Senators have had to play playoff hockey for the last month here, and this team can be rugged and annoying. Ottawa in 7.
Keith: Ottawa in 5.
Penguins 🐧 vs Flyers 🐤
Peter: Meteor. But not really. The Flyers are mediocre team who crept into the loffs because the Caps fumbled it. The Penguins drive traffic to the net and have Sid and Geno. I’m too told and they’re too old for me to pretend to hate them anymore. Pittsburgh in 6.
Ian: It’s hard to pick here because I want both franchises to experience nothing but misery, but if I had to choose, unfortunately, it’s the Pens. Should be a dumb, fun series though. Pittsburgh in 6.
Keith: Philadelphia in 5.
Share your picks below. Do it like this:
Team in N games
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