This is not going to be a normal game recap. This game was too powerful, too weird, too Capitals-ish to be a normal game recap. The whole thing washed over me like a rogue wave of diarrhea and hundred-dollar bills. I’m stunned, I’m dazzed, I’m pinned from Narnia, I’m malding, and I’m boomed. You are too, so don’t deny it.
(The Caps beat the Islanders, by the way.)
It started with sucking, as the Capitals allowed two goals in the first period — a net-crash from Pageau and then Barzal on a break. But then the Caps of the second period arrived, a wholly different and much better hockey team. Evgeny Kuznetsov and Alex Ovechkin got two goals inside two minutes, tying the game and making me feel feelings I’ve not felt in years.
Early in the third, Alex Ovechkin gave the Caps a late lead with a gorgeous solo effort. The Caps held on like Wilson Phillips to take their first meaningful win since the pre-covidian era.
CAPS WIN! Caps trail in the series 3-1.
Caps: [does anything competent]
— RMNB (@russianmachine) August 19, 2020
— Ian Oland (@ianoland) August 19, 2020
That Joe B suit above is not the last Joe B suit of 2020. The Caps are alive. They took the adrenaline needle out of the box and shoved into their chest and pushed the plunger, and now we get at least one more game of the boys. We get at least one more game of Braden Holtby, my all-time fave, in a Caps uniform.
And more than that, we get a moment of affirmation: The Caps are not that trash-ass team that humiliated themselves for three games to their former coach. This team can still dig deep, they can still play for each other, and they can still get dangerously horny for goals. For all the noise made about scoring ugly goals, the boys painted some pretty pictures in the paint. They’re a bunch of contrarian brats, and you love them.
The most effed up thing this team does to you is make you hope.
— RMNB (@russianmachine) April 16, 2018
I can’t believe these grinning idiots just did this to us. Maybe on Thursday they can do it again. I’m all in.
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