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SCOAR 1000 MOAR: Caps beat Pens 5-2!

By Peter Hassett

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January 11, 2017 11:53 pm

The Washington Capitals dropped the Pittsburgh Penguins in a home-ice battle that had everything you love: Braden Holtby heroics, explosive Ovechkin goals, knee-on-knee hits, unpunished butt-ends to the face, runaway penalty jags, nearly blown Caps leads, and Sidney Crosby’s face.

Alex Ovechkin gave Pittsburgh a 35-second headstart and then scored with a delightfully retro drive. Ovi continued his tour through goals of yore with an Ovi Shot from the Ovi Spot in the second period. In the third Justin Williams worked his old butt off to give Washington a three-goal lead, which was good because the Pens pushed back hard.

Evgeni Malkin busted Holtby’s shutout with a goal on a dubious power play, but Nick Backstrom nullified it with a lovely layup assisted by TJ Oshie, who committed the slash that served up Patric Hornqvist’s power-play goal. Lars Eller got an empty-netter to summon bailamos.

Caps beat Penguins 5-2!

Nothing is forbidden anymore!

  • Quite appropriately, Alex Ovechkin‘s 1000th career point was a goal. Even more appropriately, it was assisted by his BFF Nick Backstrom. And somehow even more appropriate than that, Ovi wasn’t done yet: he added a power-play goal in the second period.
  • I’m strangely disappointed that Ovi’s big night happened on a nationally televised game. The CSN team and Joe Beninati have been exhaustive and impassioned chroniclers of Ovechkin’s work this last decade. I would’ve loved to have heard Joe call the big goal. I also would’ve loved to see the Ovechkin family’s reaction, which NBC totally missed. At least we got these great performances by Wes and Walton, who are also my faves.

  • TJ Oshie returned to active play after a short injury scare. He let us know he was feeling okay with two assists and three minor penalties.
  • In the second period, former Cap/overachieving AHLer  Steve Oleksy collided knee-on-knee with current Cap/still underrated Dmitry Orlov. The refs called it a trip.
  • In the third period, bellicose pylon/future Wilkes-Barre resident Steve Oleksy collided knee-on-knee with current Cap/delicate soufflé Marcus Johansson. The refs called it a trip.
  • Earlier, Ian Cole butt-ended Johansson in the face. Cole faced no reprisal in any form, which is odd because I thought we all agreed that precious Marcus is off-limits?

  • In the opposite manner, newish Cap Brett Connolly obviously doesn’t know that beloved ex-Cap Eric Fehr is not supposed to be high-sticked in his Winklerian face.
  • Is it odd that — on a night when Alex Ovechkin was so obviously the star — I can’t stop thinking about Braden Holtby, who is playing out of his very good looking skull right now? Since he got pulled against the Leafs on January 3, he’s been so flirtatiously close to perfect. He hasn’t allowed a goal during 5-on-5 yet. And had the Caps skaters not lost their self-control and/or the refs their dang minds, Holtby would’ve added another notch to his stylish mens fashion belt.
  • This is some compelling internet content right here:

  • It was a rare off-night for the Lars Eller line, who got fairly owned. In their defense, there wasn’t a ton of 5-on-5 in this game, though the Penguins reliably had the puck for the duration.
  • There was dust-up in the third period involving Carl Hagelin and Evgeny Kuznetsov. Dmitry Orlov, a peripheral player, was the only one to be penalized. Aaaaaalright. Whatever you say, Dean Morton and Jean Hebert.
  • The Caps, upon realizing the storybook nature of the night, immediately set out to spoil it.
  • Oh god I just remembered Braden Holtby again. He’s inhuman.

Alex Ovechkin and a horse with the same hair as Alex Ovechkin of the night

A very good boy of the night

Hey, friends, can we talk real quick? The world outside is an overflowing toilet, but in our tiny little corner things are good. Washington’s hockey club enjoys the sport’s best scorer and the sport’s best goalie, and we get to enjoy them both.

I’m bringing Dr. Girlfriend to Friday’s game against the Blackhawks (section 416, what up), and it’s perfect timing. The team is good and — more often than not — they are also bracingly fun to watch. Ovi is still Ovi, and he’s got a supporting cast that’s stronger than this club has seen in a long time. If they can knock off the knucklehead stuff, there’s not much than can stop them.

Full Coverage of Caps vs. Penguins

Our Holtbeast shirts are 17 percent off right now, by the way.

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