Sunrise Snoozer, Shootout Saga: Panthers beat Caps 2-1 (Shootout)

December 16, 2014 11:25 pm

Photo: Eliot J. Schechter

Kind of a snoozer in Sunrise. The way the Washington Capitals played against the Florida Panthers was so button-up and boring I was waiting for the dowager countess of Grantham to say something snarky. No team wanted to win this one, and then things went completely apenuts in the shootout.

Mike Green choked up the puck to Scottie Upshall to give Derek McKenzie a layup, making it 1-0 for the Panthers going into the first intermission. Troy Brouwer tied it on the power play in the second, getting the puck back after a block by Willie Mitchell. A washed-out kicked goal by Brooks Laich meant we were headed for overtime, which was exciting enough I guess, but no result.

Prepare yourself for the shootout bullet epic!

Fehr didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Huberdeau didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Backstrom didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Bjugstad didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Kuznetsov didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Boyes didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Ovechkin PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET.
Jokinen also put the biscuit in the basket.
Brouwer didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Kopecky didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Latta didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
My god this is going long. Epix show is almost over by now.
Barkov didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Brooks PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET.
Bolland also put the biscuit in the basket. Harumph.
Johansson didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Flash didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. He burned the biscuit.
Schmidt didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Upshall didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Ward PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET.
MacKenzie also put the biscuit in the basket. It never ends
Carlson PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET.
Bergenheim put the biscuit in the basket. This is my hell.
Beagle didn’t put the biscuit in the basket, but shoulda been a biscuit-delivering beagle.
Hayes didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. Life is meaningless and full of pain.
Green didn’t didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Campbell didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Chimera’s biscuit missed the basket by a mile.
Gudbranson didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. You can’t put a biscuit in the 5-hole.
Wilson didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Ekblad didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Niskanen didn’t put the biscuit in the basket because the stupid crossbar.
Kulikov didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
BORPIK PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET!!!!
Olsen didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. 17 rounds down.
Alzner didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Mitchell didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Backstrom, part II, didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Jokinen, part II, didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. I no longer fear death.
Ovechkin didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
Bjudgstad put the biscuit in the basket! WINNER. FINALLY. I’M OKAY WITH THIS.

Panthers beat Caps 2-1 in the longest shootout I can remember!

The refs, the Caps, and the Cats played the first period like they had somewhere to be. No penalties, only a few whistles. It’s like they were worried about the Epix show. I wish they had stayed that punctual in the third period.
Scary moment with Brooks Laich in the second period when Scottie Upshall smushed his knee into the boards. Laich returned after a TV timeout looking only slightly sore. Everything he does makes me panic now.
Despite the shot-attempt differential, the Panthers seemed to have a couple tricks to exploit the Caps, particularly below the goal line. That’s how they got to Mike Green, whose trade value plummeted by one full bags of pucks on that turnover-cum-goal.
The second line of Troy Brouwer, Evgeny Kuznetsov, and Marcus Johansson did not have a good night. In a game spent mostly in the offensive zone, the second line (2a line) were mostly hemmed in the DZ. Aaaaaand joke of the night:

No, THIS is a turnover machine. RT @CJC_95: @russianmachine Johansson is a turnover machine tonight pic.twitter.com/OzT0OnozFU

— RMNB (@russianmachine) December 17, 2014

Jason Chimera returned to active service tonight. I know this because I saw him in the penalty box.
I though the Capitals had the lead in the third period based on how aggressive they were playing, but no. I was wrong. They did not. I don’t understand these bursts of impassivity from the guys. Do they even know Epix is watching? The Caps surrendered the possession advantage completely in the final frame.
The stat sheet is telling me this was a bruising 90-hit game, but my lying eyes tell me otherwise. Neither team seemed particularly committed, and I didn’t catch many guys except for the Wilson, Ovechkin, and Upshall finishing most of their hits. P.S. the NHL’s real-time stat system is a load of hooey.
Brooks Laich‘s kicked-in goal late in the third challenge Toronto’s War Room to adjudicate. I thought the league wanted to allow more of those this year, but apparently this was still too naughty. Great effort by the third (2b) line anyway. Maybe the best shift of the night?
BORPIK.