The second round of the playoffs was a lot of fun, and not only because Ian went 0 for 4 in his predictions. Now the stakes get even higher, as we’ve got just two series to predict.
So here’s Keith.
(Pictured: Keith I, whom I lost)
Keith, a Coin, II, is a 1990 quarter minted in Pennsylvania. Keith II was lost for some time, so his son Keith III inherited his lands and titles, to the woe of the peasants. But now Keith II is back, and he shot an arrow through a bunch of axe heads or something, I don’t know. There’s no continuity here. It’s not like the Marvel movies; it’s more of a loose anthology feel. Anyway, he is right about half of the time, which is the point of the bit.
Here’s how it’s gone so far, using the universal 🚽 and 🌮 score-keeping system.
|Vegas beat Chicago||🌮||🚽||🚽|
|Colorado beat Arizona||🌮||🚽||🚽|
|Dallas beat Calgary||🚽||🌮||🌮|
|Vancouver beat St Louis||🚽||🌮||🚽|
|New York beat Washington||🚽||🌮||🌮|
|Boston beat Carolina||🌮||🚽||🌮|
|Philadelphia beat Montreal||🚽||🌮||🚽|
|Tampa beat Columbus||🚽||🌮||🚽|
|Vegas beat Vancouver||🌮||🚽||🚽|
|Dallas beat Colorado||🚽||🚽||🚽|
|New York beat Philadelphia||🚽||🚽||🌮|
|Tampa beat Boston||🚽||🚽||🌮|
Peter: The Knights have a rain date with the Cup Final. Mark Stone is doing things that you should not be able to do in the middle of a hockey game. Lehner has proven himself to be up to the job. The Stars have succeeded on an unsustainable goal explosion that will not last. Knights in 6.
Ian: I’m back after suffering the embarrassment of going “0 for 4” in my predictions (which definitely weren’t made by Peter after he put the wrong matchups in the WordPress preview and then when he tried to get me to update, I was in the mountains and had no cell service). Sure, the number one-seeded Vegas Golden Knights needed seven games to dismiss the Vancouver Canucks, but I blame that mostly on their harrowing encounter of a Thatcher Demko (hoteous goaltenderous) in the wild. Just one look at a hoteous goaltenderous (especially one in the Jaroslav Halak genus), can cause sudden confidence-loss, diarrhea, and dashed Stanley Cup dreams. Another side effect is worthless corsis. But now that Thatcher is gone, I’m expecting Vegas to find the net again at a much higher rate than before. Dallas, who has been just plucky enough to make it to the Conference Final, just won’t have enough firepower to compete. Knights in 5.
Keith, a coin: Knights.
Peter: On a constitutional level, I reject the Islanders. Their vibe is contrary to my vibe, and that cannot stand. Good news for me is that the Tampa Bay Lightning are rested and ready to rip them up. Let’s see Barry’s grind-em-down hockey work against Point and Hedman and Kuch. Bolts in 5.
Ian: First, let me start this by saying I don’t think the Islanders are particularly talented. What makes them so hard to beat is that they are fast and that they have players in roles that are perfectly suited for them. Their shut-down system is basically an admission of their faults – they kinda suck – but when that system is played to a tee, it can be really really hard to beat. Meanwhile, the Lightning are…😎… lighting it up. They are fast, talented, and skilled, but I worry they will fall into the same trap other teams have and scuffle against the Isles’ suffocating defense. Regardless, I’m going to pick Tampa because something feels magical about this team right now. This year, they will stop being the Buffalo Bills of the Eastern Conference Final. Bolts in 7. (I hope you enjoyed my nature metaphor and pun.)
Keith, a coin: Islanders.
Share your picks below. Do “Team in # of games” so it’s easier to read for a grumpus like me.
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