Redditor /u/A_huge_waffle posted an innocent comment in a game day thread of the subreddit /r/hockey. The user said “If Brooks Orpik scores a goal this game I will write a 25 page essay on why he should be a first ballot Hall of Famer and post it.”
That comment came before Game Two of the Stanley Cup Final between Orpik’s Caps and the Vegas Golden Knights. It turned out to be destiny. Brooks Orpik scored the game-winning goal in the Caps 3-2 win over the Golden Knights. The goal marked Orpik’s first tally of the 2017-18 season.
/u/A_huge_waffle kept his side of the deal.
You can find the full essay in a public Google document, but the theme of the 6,051 word masterpiece is Mr. Waffle realizing just how wrong he was to doubt Orpik. He has now realized that it is his mission to get Orpik into the NHL’s Hall of Fame.
I’ll sample a small section of the paper now to give you a taste of what you’re in for.
In total, Orpik has played over fifteen seasons of professional hockey. He has lead his teams to multiple championships, shut down opponents, made significant off the ice contributions, and shown that he has what it takes in order to make it into the Hockey Hall of Fame. Since high school, Brooks Orpik was destined for greatness and any team that is lucky enough to have him on their roster has had a dramatic increase in chances to win their respective leagues championship.
While playing in the American Hockey League, one sixth of all of Orpik’s goals were game winning goals. Only one tenth of Gretzky’s NHL goals were game winners. This shows that Orpik can be clutch when he has to be, and saves his goal scoring capabilities for the most important of times.
Even more impressive is his NHL playoffs game winning goal percentage. That percentage is 66%. Almost no other player in history has a percentage that high that has played more than 20 playoff games. Orpik steps up in the playoffs, and that is the reason he is a two time Stanley Cup Champion. Alex Ovechkin does not even have two Stanley Cups and he is one of, if not, the greatest goal scorer to ever live.
Having grit separates the good players from the great players. In one of the greatest documentaries to ever be made, “Goon”, Xavier Laflamme had everything but grit. He was one of the best goal scorers, one of the best playmakers, one of the flashiest people on the ice, but he lacked grit which caused his downfall. Orpik has what Xavier lacks. He isn’t scared to go into corners hard and get physical with the opponents. His presence on the ice elevates his teams play and leads them to huge wins in the most crucial of games. His grit alone should get him in to the Hockey Hall of Fame.
Overall, the essay obviously does poke some fun at Orpik, but also outlines the rugged blueliner’s charitable efforts, what he meant to the Stanley Cup Capitals, and how he offers true intangibles that most players in the league cannot.
Headline photo: Patrick Smith
RMNB is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.
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