Okay. Y’all. Get this. Before the game, I hit up twitter to say I was feeling a Vrana goal tonight. Then, outta nowhere, some clown came at me with this.
Orpik goal bookmark this tweet
— Ford Kendrick (@Fckendrick) May 30, 2018
But then, in spite of everything we know about how the universe works, it happened.
Brooks Orpik, 37-year-old defensemen for the Washington Capitals, who took 54 shots all season, has scored in the Stanley Cup Final.
Brooks Orpik's first goal since February 26, 2016 could NOT have come at a better time. 3-1, Washington. #ALLCAPS #StanleyCup pic.twitter.com/xk64N3agyQ
— Washington Capitals (@Capitals) May 31, 2018
Lars Eller carried through neutral and into the Vegas zone. Andre Burakovsky zipped towards the net, but Eller chose another shooter: Brooks gosh darn Orpik, who had not scored since February 26, 2016. With a good screen by Brett Connolly and in blatant defiance of the rules of the universe, Orpik scoarpik’d.
This is – well, this is Orpik’s first goal of the playoffs, obviously.
Russian Machine Never Breaks is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.
All original content on russianmachineneverbreaks.com is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported (CC BY-NC-SA 3.0)– unless otherwise stated or superseded by another license. You are free to share, copy, and remix this content so long as it is attributed, done for noncommercial purposes, and done so under a license similar to this one.