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Blackhawks beat Caps 7-1

By Peter Hassett

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February 17, 2018 12:04 am

Holy wow, the Caps stunk in Chicago.

Blackhawks beat Caps 7-1.

I… um… I have no idea how to write about this. The goals were like, um, they were like.

Hmm.

Okay, you know the movie-within-a-movie from Home Alone, Angels with Filthy Souls? The goals were like the tommy gun, and Braden Holtby was Snakes.

Toews, Saad, Schmaltz, some asshole, Hartman, Anisimov, Debrincat. Yeah, Tom Wilson got a neat tip-in in the first period, but it was a lonely spot of offense in a sea of oh god oh god just let it end. The goals lined up with the possession, which is another way of saying that the Hawks owned this game utterly. A team that will not make the playoffs handed the Caps, who lead the Metro (at least for now), their asses.

I don’t know Braden Holtby, but I know Braden Holtby. Ya know? While he voiced disappointment in his team’s performance lately, I suspect he’ll consider Saturday a personal failing. And sure, the Toews goal was a tricky one that he should be able to stop, but I think it’d be unfair to paint this as Holtby’s loss alone. Washington’s team defense was flagrantly incompetent.

I mean, what the fart was this?

And here, I suppose is where we pivot. I think I’m justifiably resigned to the reality that Brooks Orpik (outshot 18 to 2, or 10-percent shot share, which can scarcely be considered competitive pro hockey) is unbenchable under this administration, who further are unwilling to adjust his usage, while the front office has done nothing to give coaching any alternatives. Nothing will change here, and though Orpik was just one player who failed among, um, well, literally all of them, and though he’s not personally at fault for his deployments and ice time and partners and age, his season represents in miniature what’s going wrong at scale in Washington right now.

Firing Barry Trotz, who tonight coached his 1500th NHL game, after a dispiriting 7-1 defeat, would not solve the problems in the team’s defensive depth. It would not give Jay Beagle a dependable linemate like he had in Dan Winnik. Those are the manifest failures of management, and they’re just as fixable today as they were in mid November, when it was already readily apparent what was broken.

Trotz has foibles. For damn sure. His deference to experience over youth (which not all pundits agree about, but I do) is annoying, but it’s only a marginal cost to the team. I can’t quantify what Trotz’s penchant for giving Jay Beagle cameo defensive-zone faceoffs is costing the team, but I suspect it’s quite a bit. I guess we can safely say that Trotz has gained some bad habits this season.

Still, there isn’t a simple, single-dose solution to what ails Washington. This game was a burn-the-tape/fire-the-coach kind of game, but firing the coach won’t help. Or, maybe, it won’t help on its own.

But for tonight, I hope we can agree that the Caps need a change. No wait, lemme take another swing at it: The Caps need changes. Plural. Ticket prices are going up, but the quality of the on-ice product is spiraling downward. This is not sustainable.

And I think I’ll leave it there for now. All that’s left is Joe B’s suit, which was nice, and the Dark Lord, who is necessary.

Full RMNB Coverage of Caps at Hawks

Headline photo: Chase Agnello-Dean

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