Backstrom after taking an elbow from Rene Bourque. (Photo credit: Clydeorama)
Did you think we were over this? We’re not.
Nick Backstrom has missed 22 games since absorbing Rene Bourque‘s elbow to his head on January 3rd. He has not skated in practice, and there is no timetable for his return. The Capitals have gone 8-11-3 without Nick Backstrom and are no longer among the east’s top 8. We’ve talked about Bourque endlessly and we even made a Punch-out style video about him, but hell no we’re not over this yet.
Neither is the team. Earlier this month, Brooks Laich told the Washington Post, “I don’t think our guys are ever going to forget what happened.”
The Capitals return home on Friday after a floundering road trip. There’s no reason to believe that any recent trends will magically reverse, so we’re encouraging this sideshow. And that’s why we’re debuting our new campaign for Rene Bourque: PUNCH THIS FACE.
Sure, Hendricks gave it a shot on January 18, but we weren’t satisfied. And it’s not like Backstrom sprang back into action as a result. We need to be sure it goes right this time.
Ehow.com offers indispensable advice on throwing a punch, including when to shout “yeehaw” or “bam”, how to exclude parents and bosses from your list of potential targets, and to always conclude the punching process by running away. Good tips if not immediately transferable to hockey.
Capitals Red Line contextualized fighting on an icy surface. The lower friction coefficient, we are told, makes even awesome-looking punches a bit less potent. Keep this in mind, whatever pugilistic Caps guy steps up, and keep your blades perpendicular to the punch vector.
The rest falls on us, the fans.
During Friday’s game, all Verizon Center attendees will boo loudly when Bourque touches the puck. He’ll be the dude in the white jersey, sporting number 27. If Bourque gets hit or goes to the box, it is required of you to applaud until you joy-puke.
And finally, Ian and Rachel have created these printable masks and accompanying posters for you.
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Download the Mask | Download the Poster |
Here’s what you do:
If you don’t wanna wear the mask, just grab this All-purpose Poster (pictured at bottom).
Feel free to make copies for your friends and neighbors. Pass ’em out in Chinatown.
When our art and your leg work combine, there’s no way the Caps will miss their target. It’s like anti-social Captain Planet.
Crash the net.
Russian Machine Never Breaks is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.
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