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A review of the Capitals’ original artwork available for charity auction

The Capitals have been selling greeting cards drawn by the players in their stores and online. Now the original pieces of artwork are on sale through Handbid. The auction runs until 9 PM EST December 21, and proceeds go to charity.

Eleven players are participating in the project. A detailed analysis of their artistic masterpieces can be found below.

Alex Ovechkin

In this withering critique of America’s youth-obsessed culture, Ovechkin’s spiraling blue lines mirror the spiral of the blue “party hat,” representing the conflicting linear nature of time and the cyclical patterns of our lives. Happy birthday indeed to the smiling yellow mask within us all.

Braden Holtby

Norman Rockwell passed away in 1978, but the tradition of his cozy depictions of family and home has been continued in this warm rendering of the holiday hearthfire drawn by goaltender Braden Holtby.

Evgeny Kuznetsov

The minimalism utilized in Kuznetsov’s abstract geometric explosion truly captures the raw joy of celebration without adulteration.

Madison Bowey

Madison Bowey’s is just really cute. 10/10 would slip into a crush’s locker.

Nic Dowd

The charming tree and smiling snowperson in Nic Dowd’s…wait a minute. This snowperson looks familiar.

It would appear that Nic Dowd and Madison Bowey participated in art forgery, perhaps relying on the crutch of a stencil or tracing. THIS WHOLE THING RESTS UPON A THRONE OF LIES.

(10/10 would open those cute lil presents under the tree still.)

Matt Niskanen

Niskanen employs a traditional color scheme in his meditation on American patriotism. The celebration of independence can be seen in the motion of the shooting star, defying gravity.

TJ Oshie

Um this kind of just looks like two minions high-fiving. With their feet.

Travis Boyd

The details could easily be lost in Travis Boyd’s piece with all of the negative space of his canvas filled grey snowflakes. The real focal points here are the turkeyweagle atop the Christmas tree and the adorable Santa-hat wearing hockey player who happens to be missing the same tooth as Alex Ovechkin.

Christian Djoos

Christian Djoos took an exquisitely minimalist approach to his card. It leaves the viewer with unanswered questions like: is “get well soon” a hope or a command? Is the snowperson wearing a scarf or a tie? WAS A STENCIL UTILIZED IN THE DRAWING OF THIS CARD?

Andre Burakovsky

In contrast to fellow Swede Christian Djoos, Andre Burakovsky’s “get well soon” card is literally as cute and sweet as possible. Look at the radiant sunshine. The flourishing flowers. The beatific butterfly. A MASTERPIECE.

Lars Eller

The lower case “i” in birthday haunts me. Sure, the cupcakes look tasty and the dimensionality of the present defies the laws of physics, but why is the “i” the only letter that’s not capitalized? This one requires further study and deserves a closer look.

Bidding is open until December 21 for the originals, but you can order a set of reproductions for $20 online now. Proceeds support the Shoebox Project and Martha’s Table.

RMNB is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHLPA, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.

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