It’s a scary time of year. No better place for that than Vancouver, the city where a pair of decrepit, identical ghouls shamble north and south on a team that is undead but doesn’t know it.
Despite a .500 record early on, the Canucks are probably in for some suffering this season. But that doesn’t mean they won’t be dangerous against the Caps tonight. Doomed hero Loui Eriksson has some life in him still, and the Caps’ special teams have a dark secret (they’re bad).
Game’s on at 10 PM on CSN. There will be blood.
|Team||Record||Possession||PDO||Power Play||Penalty Kill|
Ovechkin – Backstrom – Williams
Johansson – Kuznetsov – Wilson
Burakovsky – Eller – Oshie
Sanford – Beagle – Connolly
Alzner – Niskanen
Orlov – Carlson
Orpik – Schmidt
I’m thinking there will be a lot of Luke Cages, Elevens, Barbs, Harley Quinns, Harambes (RIP), and evil clowns.
Anyone being David Pumpkins — sorry, David S. Pumpkins — should get a high five.
But if you see a Ken Bone, it’s okay to throw things at him. You have my permission.
Photo: Anthony Bolante
Russian Machine Never Breaks is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.
All original content on russianmachineneverbreaks.com is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported (CC BY-NC-SA 3.0)– unless otherwise stated or superseded by another license. You are free to share, copy, and remix this content so long as it is attributed, done for noncommercial purposes, and done so under a license similar to this one.