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Oshie Scored! BTW, Caps beat Bolts 4-2

By Peter Hassett

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November 27, 2015 8:46 pm

one-of-your-french-girls-alex-ovechkin

One of your French girls.

The Tampa Bay Lightning are a good team, but you wouldn’t know it from Friday’s purple nurple at the hands of the Washington Capitals. Until the final ten minutes, the Caps were playing next-level hockey.

Alex Ovechkin scored from the Ovi Spot, but hold up, because Jason Chimera got the assist, and it was a weird one. Flash forward to late in the second period, when Kuznetsov slap-passed to Chimera and then Marcus Johansson kicked one in late to make it 3-0 before the second intermission. TJ Oshie launched a lovely slapper on a third-period power play to make it 4-0 and invoke Enrique.

Bryan Boyle cracked Braden Holtby’s shutout with under ten minutes left, and then Victor Hedman took advantage of a rough defensive shift by the fourth line to get in the two-goal hole. The Caps held off a tremendous comeback effort and took the victory.

Caps beat Lightning 4-2. The Caps are 16-5-1. Hello. Let’s dance.

  • The Caps put 18 shots on net in the first period, which is a lot. It’s more than they’ve had in any other period this season. That set the tone for the night, and the tone for the night was mostly the sound of a steamroller until the final ten minutes.
  • Jason Chimera scores in fits and starts. He got three apples on the Avs a week ago, then got quiet, and then here he goes again. The assist on Ovi’s power-play marker was noteworthy for the different setup that usual and Ovechkin’s patient hold before the release. Then Chimera was the executioner on Kuznetsov’s great slap pass.
  • Did we ever find out what the deal was with the Bastard Executioner? Did he just execute bastards? That seems way too specific.
  • Chimere has 8 points in 8 games. Meanwhile, Evgeny Kuznetsov is averaging two points a game lately, so that’s nice for them.
  • Below is an example of the legal way to kick a goal, courtesy of Steph. Good goal for Marcus Johansson.

  • Ryan Callahan is a bad hockey player.
  • Oh thank goodness that TJ Oshie scored. If Jason Chimera has more goals than Oshie at season’s end I will weep for months. Right now they’re both at six, but Oshie’s got 24 more in him I think. Feels like the universe owes him at least five right now. Speaking of Oshie, how bout these reverse jinx tweets tonight?

  • I won’t embed tweets from people who said the S-word before Boyle scored. More on that b.s. Boyle goal later, but to that point, the Caps backed off quite a bit in that final frame, which is how the Bolts doubled their shot output and got two past Holtby.
  • Braden Holtby‘s mask came off again after Steven Stamkos rocketed a shot off it. Someone stop this from happening. I don’t care how.
  • Here’s a dispatch from Rachel, who was at Verizon Center tonight: WHOEVER IS TRYINF TO START THE WAVE NEEDA TO S T O P. She is right.
  • Is an empty-net goal too much to ask?
joeb

Let’s rap real quick. I’ll have a lot more on this tomorrow, but here’s the short version. I’ll put it in bold italic underline centered because that’s really ugly and it will piss off Ian:

The Caps are really good.

The Bolts are one of the best defensive teams in the league and yet still the Caps nurped them until they turned purp. This game is like one of those sticks that you use to see how long something is and then you’re like, oh wow, this is pretty long, I’m really glad I measured this. Ooh, measuring stick. That’s what they’re called. Anyway, this game was one of those because the Bolts are long but the Caps are longer and they don’t even have purple nurps.

Have a great Friday night. See you tomorrow.

Full RMNB Coverage of Caps vs Lightning

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