Alex Ovechkin Draws Alex Ovechkin, Fails Miserably

Remember when I said that the Alex Ovechkin Kharlamov Trophy press conference was the gift that keeps on giving? Today, I bring you a translation and GIFs of Alex Ovechkin drawing Alex Ovechkin via SovSport.

Alex Ovechkin drawn by Alex Ovechkin looks like a cross between Hey Arnold, Doug Funnie, and a stick figure. Ovechkin’s girlfriend, Nastya Shubskaya, fared much better.

Video

Here’s the translated transcript via Igor Kleyner.

Alex Ovechkin: Let’s just make smileys… You make yourself as a smiley, and I’ll do myself.
Nastya Shubskaya: I make myself as a smiley?.. okay… why don’t you go first, just to figure things out.

[“Just draw little people!” yells reporter Pavel Lysenkov.]

Alex Ovechkin: A little person… All right, I’ll draw a little person… [starts drawing] [Ovechkin draws ears.]

Alex Ovechkin: This is turning out quite ugly…Now a nose…

[someone offscreen] Wait, so is this Nastya?…

Alex Ovechkin: No, this is me!

[While Ovechkin is drawing his mouth, Nastya starts giggling uncontrollably.]

Alex Ovechkin: Here is my hair… Super haircut!
Alex Ovechkin: And now my teeth…
Alex Ovechkin: And now – the body!.. That’s it!

[Someone asks from behind the camera, “Where is the body?”]

Alex Ovechkin: (pointing to the line just below his head) That’s the body!
Nastya Shubskaya: That’s not the body… That’s you neck!
Alex Ovechkin: All right I’ll fix my neck (draws little rectangle below head) Now your turn.

[Nastya Shubskaya starts drawing, as she does her eyes Ovi starts his critique.]

Alex Ovechkin: Are you Chinese?

[As Nastya begins to draw, someone off camera asks,” Will your body be the same?”]

Alex Ovechkin: Yes, exactly the same!
Nastya Shubskaya: No!

[Nastya Shubskaya completes her drawing, then puts letter Ж above herself, and М above Ovi. Usually these letters are used to designate public facilities for Ladies and Gentlemen.] [After they sign the portraits, Ovi moves in to fix his limbs.]

Nastya Shubskaya: Let me also fix my…
Alex Ovechkin: No! Look, your head [unlike mine] is so beautiful already!…

[The couple takes a photo in front of their work.]

GIFs

A sped-up version of Ovechkin drawing himself.

Ovechkin signs the self-portrait.

The Self Portrait