I swear I’m not making this up.

Groupon has a new offer. For a good price you’ll get tickets to the Caps and a t-shirt, but who cares. Just check out the promo text:

Hockey teams are often named after intimidating natural phenomena, such as the Tampa Bay Lightning, the Colorado Avalanche, and the Tuscaloosa Puberty. Experience the fury with this GrouponLive deal.

(Emphasis mine.)

Players who get snagged in the expansion draft are in for some dramatic changes. New traditions, Alabama heat, hair in unexpected places.

Meanwhile, LivingSocial is offering partial season tickets to the Washington Warthogs.

Major stick tap to whoever this copywriter was. That’s an RMNB-quality comedy triple there.

Thank to Steve U. for the tip.