Happy Friday, people. Enjoy it, ’cause for the next few months, your Fridays belong to Uncle Ted’s team.

In November, December, and January, you will have precisely one Friday free each month. You will use it to do Important Things like watch Point Break on Netflix, cook brownies for yourself for discernible reason, and perform a double-blind cohort study to determine if there’s any meaningful difference in the taste between Coors Light, Miller Lite, and Bud Light (hypothesis: there is not).

But then it’s back to the salt mines, where you will be required to watch Friday night hockey on 14 different occasions. The good news is we’ll be here with you, not meeting strange women, not playing fooesball at a dive bar while listening to 12 Play, and not playing laser tag with 14-year-olds at the mall.

Happy Friday the 13th, homies!