Photo was touched up to remove the NHL executive handshake-passing the ref a 100-dollar bill. (Photo credit: Greg Fiume)
With their 5-0 loss to the New York Rangers in game seven, the Washington Capitals have been ungently booted from the postseason again. A period of healing and reconciliation now begins (also probably some suntans), but first we need to take a look at the sadness. The infinite, infinite sadness.
Let’s just take it all in, mope around for the next day or two like red-rocking Eeyores, and wallow in the wah wah wah (that’s what a sad trombone sounds like). It’s not fun; no, but we need to give the grieving process time to do its thing.
A rare moment in which Ribeiro stank both literally and figuratively? (Photo credit: Greg Fiume)
Clockwise, starting from Ovi: Stunned, annoyed, yawning, guffawing, free agent-y, and totally over this crap. (Photo credit: USA Today)
Oh great, next time you wanna be super-depressed, you don’t have to watch Requiem For a Dream. You can just pop open this GIF and save yourself two hours. (GIF by SBNation.com)
“Boredom is the root of all evil, the despairing refusal to be oneself”. – Kierkegaard (Photo credit: @dcsportsbog)
Sad dad. Sad dad. Sad dad. (Photo credit: @recordsANDradio)
Oh criminy, now we are zooming in on sad dad? Have you no decency, cameraman? (Photo credit: @dcsportsbog)
“I know it was you, Henrik. You broke my heart. You broke my heart!” (Photo credit: Patrick McDermott)
“Well son, since you haven’t learned to respect your elders, it’s time you learn to respect your betters.” (Photo credit: Alex Brandon)
This handshake nearly caused a goals-versus-threshold singularity that would have swallowed Marc-Andre Fleury whole. (Photo credit: Patrick McDermott)
The Building of America’s Hockey Capital is running a bit late and over-budget. (Photo credit: Alex Brandon)
ARE YOU KIDDING. DUDE, THIS IS THE SADDEST THING EVER. CANNOT EVEN CAPTION THIS. WOW. WOW. (Photo credit: Alex Brandon)
Someone in the press corps just told Oates that Sun-In Hair Lightener is no longer in fashion. And that punk is dead. (Photo credit: Nick Wass)
How this guy got no points in seven games is a puzzle for the ages. (Screengrab via Monumental Network)
Karl Alzner forced to stand by silently while his beard conducts a lengthy interview. (Screengrab via Monumental Network)
Green looks like a tougher and only slightly sadder version of the singer from Brand New. Who sucks by the way. (Screengrab via Monumental Network)
Mama Backstrom is disappointed in her son’s play, sure. But his facial hair is an outright disgrace to the family name. (Screengrab via Monumental Network)
No snarky caption. This guy is boss. Plus: hands-down best neckbeard on the team. (Screengrab via Monumental Network)
The sadness will pass soon. Try to put a smile on your face. And keep your head up. <3 RMNB.
Russian Machine Never Breaks is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.
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