Game Recap | RMNB

Everything Clicks In Capitals 8-1 Victory Over Thrashers

Pretty Much Summarizes The Entire Night For the Trashers (Photos via AP)

As we prepared for tonight’s Caps/Thrashers game, we were alerted to three crucial things: 1.) The Caps had plane troubles again and had to depart for Atlanta very early this morning (per Capitals Insider) 2.) Japers Rink told us via Twitter that the Caps have never won in Atlanta on a Saturday night (0-3-1) and 3.) Capitals 9th string Goalie Brett Leonhardt made this awesome observation on Twitter: “There is legit spots on the ice in ATL where you can see the cement… guess the teams’ not the only ones mailing it in.”

Wow, huge #verbfail there, Brett.

But with these convenient excuses on hand, we here at the Russian Machine felt like it was a perfect night for our hometown team to have another mindless, letdown game and be done in by the dreaded “Reverse Lock.” Or – at the least – witness Sasha take 6 offensive-zone penalties and see just how hard Bruce could angrily stare at him without his eyes bugging out of his head.

But alas, we were treated to a blowout victory, as the Capitals took the Thrashers to the freakin’ woodshed and won by a Touchdown. … Sorry, it’s Saturday… I’m a little drunk… I’ve gotta do it:

VIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCTTTTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOORRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!
(Ed note: fast foward to 1:47 mark)

On to the bullet points:

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By Ian Oland 14 years ago

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Eat It, Canada! Caps Beat Sens 5-2

If tonight’s blistering win over the Ottawa Senators is emblematic of anything, it’s our team’s enduring hatred of Canada (America Junior). Yeah, the country’s teams have been problematic for the Caps all season, but Canada really bit off more than it could chew when it overlooked the best defenseman in its country, Mike Green, for the 2010 Olympics. Taken with Tuesday’s victory over the Canadiens and John Carlson‘s OT goal to win the World Junior Championship, tonight’s beatdown is the icy punctuation on the Caps sentence: Eat it Canada. Eat it hard. Eat delicious buffalo wings.

The Caps have been caught unawares in the first period for the past two weeks, but tonight they broke the habit with a goal by… wait– what? Boyd Gordon? We didn’t even know he was playing tonight, and all of a sudden he’s the first on the board. Joined by vet Mike Knuble, the Caps ended the first frame with a two-point lead. The team cooled off, as it alway does, in the second period, but they came back with fury unleashed in the third. The Verizon Center was crackling with energy all night, and we look forward to a report from Ian “blogpocalypse now” Oland on his visit all night.

Let’s do the bullet points.

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By Peter Hassett 14 years ago

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C! Caps Beat Habs 4-2

Alex Ovechkin - Captain for the first time against Montreal

The Caps Are Now Undefeated (1-0-0) When Peter Wears His Russian Machine Never Breaks T-Shirt

Tonight The Washington Capitals began the second half of their (championship) season. Coming off a three-game slide, it was imperative that the boys show some aggression tonight. That they did– in a barn-burning 4-2 win over the Montreal Canadiens. The Caps now have a perfect record (1-0-0) while I wear my Russian Machine Never Breaks t-shirt.

Tonight’s game marked Alexander Ovechkin‘s first game as captain. We at the Machine don’t actually understand what this means, but we can say with certitude that the embroidered “C” looks totally bad-ass on his sweater. And while the difference the new captaincy brings to the team cannot yet be quantified, we know the Caps were a Brand New Team tonight. After a glut of lifeless play in the games following former-captain Chris Clark‘s exit, the boys were back in a big way at Verizon Center this evening. And the icing on the cake? Our boy, the controversial Alexander Semin, gets the lion’s share of the credit for the win tonight.

All that and more after the jump!

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By Peter Hassett 14 years ago

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Mike Green Falls Hard to the ice as Caps lose to Kings 2-1

The Russian Machine doesn’t have much to say about the Capitals 2-1 loss the Los Angeles Kings today. It was crap. In fact, we felt this photo of Mike Green pretty much summed it up.

The Caps once again, came out in the first period with absolutely no push. To that effect, they’ve been out scored 6-0 in their past three first periods and out-shot 35-11. (Thanks Capitals Insider)

We want to take the easy road and say “Man, with Chris Clark and Milan Jurcina gone, this team is in absolute disarray. They’ve lost three straight games.” But you’ve got to look deeper than that. If you go by that logic, then the Hershey Bears are 10-1 in their last 11 because they brought Chris Bourque back . The problem is the secondary scoring for this team has been absolutely nonexistent lately and the team has not been playing a full 60 minutes at their level. The lack of intensity from anyone other than the Young Guns is troubling. And honestly, Jason Chimera seems to still be trying to find himself in Bruce Boudreau’s system.

The Capitals look like they’re a step slow. They’re losing battles. And with this being one of the NHL’s most skilled teams, we figure this is a tall-tale sign of either a team losing its focus or is in general tired. Someone needs to start banging into some bodies and create some space for others.

We hope with two home games on the slate this week, the Caps will bear down and play better in front of their own fans. And The Russian Machine Will Even Offer A Bold Prediction: We will be excited to see who will be named Captain in the coming days (Alex Ovechkin For Kapitan!!!) and receive the instant gratification of refocusing the team after soundly defeating the Montreal Canadiens on Tuesday Night. Okay guys, make it happen!

By Ian Oland 14 years ago

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Canes Whip Caps 6-3

Bruce Boudreau and Friends Look In Horror as Caps Lose 6-3

Ovechkin nets two points, yet Caps fall 6-3 (Photos via Heather Mabb)

Ovechkin nets two points (1g 1a), yet Caps fall meekly to bottom-dwelling Hurricanes 6-3 (Photos via Heather Mabb)

Gah! On pixel this looked like an easy match up. The Caps, second in the NHL and well atop the Southeast, should be able to lay down the smack on the last-place Canes for the third time this season. That sure as hell did not happen– as the Canes bested the Caps 6-3 and handed the home team their first loss inside the division all season. You could blame it on the distractions from today’s trade, a consistently incompetent defensive squad, or Jose Theodore’s top-heavy prettiness:goalstopping ratio; but the Caps got beat all around the phone booth tonight.

In a somber mood and somewhat nauseated from hot wings, let’s break it down:

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By Peter Hassett 14 years ago

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Caps Stomp Devils 4-1 In A Total Team Effort

The east coast seems to have all the NHL talent these days, so when two titans like the Caps and the Devils meet, we’re in for a good game. The two division champions have met three times already this season, and the Devils bested the Caps each time– dammit. When the puck dropped last night, the sold-out Verizon Center and dozens of fans across the Comcast SportsNet viewing area held their breath, wondering if we were to lose another to NJD …or if the real Capitals team would show up. Glancing up at the scoreboard in the waning minutes of the third period and seeing a 4-1, we can report with some certainty that it was the Stanley Cup contender Caps on the ice tonight.

Everybody gets a present tonight:

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By Peter Hassett 14 years ago

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Epic Comeback! Caps trounce Oilers 4-2

This Caps fan has tonight lost his voice from shouting at the meh-definition signal from Comcast SportsNet Plus. You can’t blame me; the Washington Capitals had a lot to shout about last night. For forty minutes it seemed like the defensemen were not equal to the task and the offense were offensively inert. The Caps, leading the Southeast division, somehow trailed the Oilers, bottom of the Northwest, by two goals going into the 3rd period. Snowbound Caps fans across the east coast buttressed themselves for another pathetic loss to a Canadian team.

And then Alexander Ovechkin showed up. The world’s best hockey player and the man my girlfriend calls “Ovenchicken” performed a hero’s task in Edmonton last night, singlehandedly pulling the boys from F Street out of a two-goal deficit. After one determined stuff manuever and another sick Ovechkian angle goal off a rebound, the Caps had renewed life. Flash and Backstrom put the nail in the coffin, and all was right in the world again: Caps beat Oilers 4-2.

CSN+ has a terrible signal. The first five minutes of ice time were tinged Viagra blue, and this Caps fan couldn’t discern Laing’s 53 from Green’s 52 for most of the game. Over the airwaves, Joe Beninati‘s exotic tie patterns read like some kind of vomitous fever dream.
Karl Alzner‘s masterful deflection into his own goal may be the punctuation at the end of his time in the NHL. His D pairing with Tyler Sloan (-1 plus/minus for the season) was particularly incompetent last night, but his kick into our own net was unforgivable. Hershey may be a better fit for his hijinx. Am I being unfair? Let me know in the comments below.
I can’t single out Alzner, as the whole defensive effort was pathetic last night. The Oilers’ offensive tactics were eerily similar to Boudreau’s Caps, what with the dumping and chasing and moving behind the goal line. Our defense was unable to chase down loose pucks behind the blue and clear it out, and that made those two soft goals against Neuvirth possible.
Jeff Schultz is on my list, too. His careless pass at center ice led to a breakaway goal for the Oilers – one night after this terrible miscue. At least when Mike Green pulled that same nonsense a few weeks ago, he had the good sense to follow it up with a make-up goal.
Alexander Ovechkin‘s 3rd period illustrated everything we love about the caveman. I don’t know what Bruce Boudreau said in the locker room at the 2nd intermission, but Alex definitely heard it. His goals owed as much to grit as they did talent, and he pulled the rest of the team up with him. Last night demonstrated once again why Capitals hockey is the most exciting hockey in the league.
But Steve Staios is paste-eating crazy. Several times the Oiler’s PK man jumped in front of Ovie’s lightning-fast slappers like he was the Edmontonian Quentin Laing or something. This guy deserves a lot of credit for neutering the Caps’ powerplay last night.
Was the Caps top line (“The Tiger Beat line”) -2 in the first 40 minutes of the game? Yikes.
Tomas Fleischmann‘s go-ahead goal was exemplary, but he followed it immediately with a lazy penalty. If that’s not a microcosm of the Caps fatal flaw, I don’t know what is.
If your hockey team cannot convert 1:51 of 5-on-3 into a goal, you’re not worthy of Lord Stanley’s Cup. I attribute this failure to Edmonton’s fantastic PK unit as much as our own incompetence. Either way, this is the second time this season our boys have struggled with completion anxiety across multiple games. Let’s hope we get our groove back against Buffalo.
Spongebob Squarepants Hilary Duff was at the game last night. For the record, Russian Machine prefers Miley Cyrus.

So I imagine by now the boys have landed in D.C. and are finding their respective homes buried under two feet of snow. If I hear about Mike Green or Alexander Semin spraining their backs while shoveling snow, I’m going to flip out. Stay mellow, watch The Jersey Shore, and drink a gingerbread latte. Three day’s rest is a fair reward for a successful trip to the tundra.

By Peter Hassett 14 years ago

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Awesome Jeff Schultz Somehow Gets Free Pass With Own Goal

Last night on Twitter, while I was in character, a few requests were made to me after the Caps 3-2 Loss to the Vancouver Canucks:

edmorgans: @russianmachine Can you “lose” Poti in a snow drift somewhere between Vancouver and Edmonton? No one would suspect you!!!
jdb820: @russianmachine Can you do to Poti what you did to Nylander?

While it’s still unclear to me what Ovechkin did to Nylander (give him vodka and an ikea gift card?), I don’t get the anger towards Tom Poti. Yes, Tom Poti took a tremendously ill-timed third period penalty for cross-checking. Yes, as he skated over to the penalty box, he completely showed up the referee, slammed the penalty box door and got awarded another penalty – making his costly 2 minute minor an even more terrible double minor. Yes, the Canucks scored during the first penalty, took a 3-2 lead they’d never relinquish, and then used the second minor penalty to erase another 2 minutes of valuable comeback time. Alright so I get it. His penalty is what allowed the Canucks to win the game.

But I’m not going to throw him under the bus. Poti is a key veteran on this team, and the penalty he took last night was at best a questionable call by the referee. He shouldn’t of cross-checked Canucks agitator Alex Burrows so high, but it was painfully clear to me that Burrows dove. If you’re going to take a penalty though, an aggressive play in the defensive zone is alright by me. Now the hooking and holding penalties Alex Semin has taken in the third period of other games – in the offensive zone – is another story.

But last night, I was more peeved with Jeff Schultz’s ill-timed own goal in the first period. Take a look Below:

Jose Theodore stopped a hooked Ryan Kesler breakaway attempt after Mike Green tried to obstruct the star winger. Schultz, who trailed on the play, came up to the stopped puck, tried to kick it from skate to stick, and then watched the goal slowly enter the yawning net in horror. Because there was a penalty in the process of being called, Bruce Boudreau begged the officials to take away the tally, because he believed Schultz demonstrated possession of the puck. I completely disagree however, because if Schultz had possession, he wouldn’t of kicked the freakin puck in the net.

So as I start reading Tarik El-Bashir’s recap in his blog, this is what I read in his introduction:

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By Ian Oland 14 years ago

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Domination in Denver: Caps beat Avs 6-1

There’s a Mike Green-shaped stain on the glass at Denver tonight.

The Capitals’ 6-1 domination over the Avalanches shouldn’t be reduced to a single nasty hit, but our journalistic spidey sense tells us that if it bleeds, it ledes. We’ve worried in the past that the team depends too much on Mike Green‘s ice presence, and perhaps other teams are starting to notice, too. In a moment of impotent rage, 240-pound David Koci smeared D-man Greenie into the glass. The poor man’s Chris Cooley did not get up for some time, and did not return to the ice. Russian Machine Never Breaks World Headquarters (located several stories beneath the Green Turtle in historic downtown Frederick) is outfitted with a dedicated, secure phone line for a situations just like this. As soon the Green phone rings, we’ll update you.

What else happened tonight? The Caps beat the living snow out of Colorado.

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By Peter Hassett 14 years ago

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Tovarich! Caps Defeat Canes in OT 4-3 With Green Game Winner

Lesson learned: Don’t split up the Ruskies.

You knew the plot already. Mike Knuble‘s return to active play had an ill portent for the Ovechkin-Backstrom-Semin (Please don’t call them the “Young Guns”) line. It turned out that Bruce Boudreau decided to demote the “lesser” Alexander to the second line with Morrison and Laich. (Russian Machine cannot abide.) After 30 lackluster minutes and a two-goal deficit, our esteemed coach must have noticed that Semin was unhappy and that Ovie’s line could not gain traction. Wisely, Boudreau restored the top line, The Care Bears (adorable, snuggly, have magical powers– get it???). Not 3 minutes later, Alexander Semin produced his first goal of the night. Cooperation among comrades!

Alexander would go on to score another before the 2nd period was out and would maintain a menacing presence in front of the Canes net all night. Semin was joined in goals by Tomas Fleischmann, who wisely took a shot rather than pass to Ovie; and Mike Green, whose overtime goal – which led the Caps to a 4-3 OT win over the Carolina Hurricanes – redeemed the shorty giveaway he made possible late in the third.

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By Peter Hassett 14 years ago

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