Kirill Marchenko made it very clear what questions he would be answering during training camp on Friday.
“I forget all English,” he said. “I know only words about hockey right now.”
Marchenko, whose agent reportedly told reporters he did not intend to re-sign with the Columbus Blue Jackets, is one of several players currently handling contract drama on the team. Adam Fantilli has yet to report to training camp as he awaits a new contract, and the team narrowly avoided arbitration with Jet Greaves this offseason.
Marchenko seemed to want to avoid any speculation or unsavory questions, masterfully providing humorous answers while saying a whole lot of nothing.
When asked where he wants to play hockey?
“On the ice,” he simply put it, technically answering the question. He then added in a quick “we’ll see,” seemingly alluding to the real question at hand.
The dodging continued as it became clear Marchenko wouldn’t reveal anything of value. In fact, he denied any knowledge of the situation, saying he hadn’t seen reports of his agent’s alleged disclosures.
Marchenko expertly steered the conversation back to hockey, constantly reiterating his sole role as a player.
“I play hockey, like, I can only talk about hockey,” he said. “It’s not my side, [the] business side. It’s on Don and them. And they figure out everything.
“My goal is to be ready.”
At one point, Marchenko even called the reporters out directly for not following his “only hockey” requirement.
“Oh, it’s too many good questions right now,” he said, after a reporter continued to push about what team exactly he wanted to play for. “I want to play hockey, that’s what I can say right now.”
“I just love [my] teammates, love to enjoy the practices, enjoy the hockey. It’s my favorite thing in the world. I just do my job.”
According to Marchenko, this topic hasn’t hit the locker room, and his teammates main topic of discussion have been about equipment. “In the locker room, it’s hockey. We’re hockey players,” he said.
Geez, this guy said hockey enough times to rival Sydney Sweeney’s “sports” count.
The “hockey” count continued to rise as the interview went on, with Marchenko saying the same thing (in case you missed it– hockey) to almost every question. He also spoke about the house he built in Russia, which, along with his expecting wife, were the only things he would admit ever trumped hockey in his thoughts.
Even when asked directly if he liked playing hockey in Columbus, he found a way around it.
“I love playing hockey, yeah,” he said after a brief pause. When the location of the question was reemphasized, he simply chuckled and replied, “Good question.”
He then gave the least convincing confirmation ever uttered. “I can say yes because I play here, for sure.”
He may have to teach a course on how to refuse to answer any questions while keeping the room on your side.
